


i used to be golden (things are different now)

by hit0miko



Category: Archie Comics, Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: F/M, Post 2X06, and betty hurts a lot, and hides a lot of pain, every one is soft, honestly wtf was that reconciliation, im pressed, in which archie is soft, the makeup i deserved
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-16
Updated: 2017-11-17
Packaged: 2019-02-03 06:20:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12742728
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hit0miko/pseuds/hit0miko
Summary: Somehow, Betty Cooper finds the time to engage in reconciliations with her best friends, but it's hard. It's so hard.





	1. i took the stars from my eyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Archie was a constant in her life, but everything changes and there is a distance that settles itself between them. Everything comes full circle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Archie and Betty, a soft friendship that deserves more!

When she thinks of Archie, she thinks of soft childhood memories and running around the neighborhood covered in popsicle drips or dirt and mud. She thinks of flashing lights through windows, secret messages and a lifetime spent together. She thinks of her first love, an absurd amount of time spent daydreaming about the All-American boy next door, hoping and praying that he loved her and looked at her the way that she did him.

And then she thinks of the exact moment when that daydream collapsed on her. That exact moment when she felt her heart break into tiny, little pieces. She had walked quietly out onto the walkway of her house and found him looking at her, and she thought of how ridiculous he looked to her, with his bowtie hanging loose and his hair mussed, as if he had been freshly kissed. But the reality of it all was that he was freshly kissed. By Veronica Lodge. And he looked at her with an emotion that she couldn't quite pinpoint. Was it distress on his face? She couldn't remember. What she did remember was the moment she opened her mouth, and with a shaky breath, asked him if her loved her. Or even liked her. She remembered how nervous she was and how hard she tried to stop the tears from threatening to fall. And then he told her with extreme certainty that he did love her.

Then, he said "I'll never be good enough for you," and Betty knew from that point on, that things had changed between her and Archie. No longer were they the best friends that she thought they were. She tried to tell herself that what he said didn't hurt as much, but in reality, it did. It hurt so much. And even after everything was good and done with, even when Betty knew she didn't love Archie in that way anymore, she still sometimes feels the hurt in her heart when she sees Archie, or when they hang out and he does something to further cement the fact that he is her best friend. Her inner self tells her that's all she'll ever be. The  _best friend_ , and she can't help but be angry and hurt, because even though he told her that she was perfect and that he'll never be good enough for her, she still sometimes felt like it was the other way around. Why hadn't she been good enough for him?

Afterwards, she finds that her and Archie aren't as close to each other as they used to be, which was to be expected, considering their strange situation (Betty, Archie and Veronica? Complicated doesn't even begin to cover it). And then when Jughead comes into the picture, she finds that space between her and Archie growing bigger and bigger, but she doesn't really take it seriously, because the four of them are always together.

Does it surprise her that he is the first one her instinct told her to reach out to when the Black Hood started calling? Yes, it does, because in a way, she and Archie are more distant than they had ever been. Does it surprise her that he comes to her rescue and tells her (with so much conviction) that he won't ever let her go through this alone? Yes, it does. And she feels so guilty, because here is Archie, so caring and determined to help her get through this insane situation and make sure she doesn't go through it alone, but here she was, all of this time, still carrying residual bitterness from the failed confession so long ago.

She can see that he tries so hard to help her in the best way that he can, and sometimes he even tries to talk her out of the things that her calls with the Black Hood make her do, and she knows that only because he wants her to be safe, and most of all, to stay true to herself. And it breaks her heart.

So one day, in the midst of all the craziness, the breakup, the drugs and the murders, she flashes her light through his window three times and he's up and looking through it in a second, and the moment he catches her eye, he knows what to do. So now, here they are, sitting in the dim light of her pastel pink room, as if Betty hasn't been talking to a serial killer on the phone for the past couple of days. Right now, it's just Archie and Betty and the night sky, just like how it was ten years ago when Alice Cooper still let him sleepover their house.

She's laying on her bed and he's leaning back on her swivel chair, but they're both looking up at the glow-in-the-dark stickers of the whole solar system and some 60-70 stars (a birthday present from him) on her ceiling. It's quiet, and Betty finds it hard to talk, but she does it anyway.

"I'm sorry."

Archie turns his head to look at her and the surprise on his face is not unexpected. He moves the chair closer to her, to the bed, and asks her, "for what?"

He sees that she's still looking up at her ceiling and some of the dim lighting in her room catches the tears forming in her eyes.

"I'm so sorry." She keeps saying.

At this point, Archie is worried out of his mind, so he climbs onto the bed and sits criss-cross next to her.

"What are you sorry for?"

She moves her hand to cover her eyes. "It's just been so hard. Everything has been so hard."

She shifts her hands, facing her palm upwards, and Archie can see it before she flinches and turns it back around. She's nervous about his reaction, but surprisingly, he doesn't press it. Instead, he sighs and moves his hand to hold hers. It was comforting, and so warm. He doesn't need to say anything, so she continues, and everything just pours out of her.

"I'm sorry for the way I acted towards you after you rejected me. I feel like ever since that moment, I distanced myself from you. And sometimes, I feel like that moment was a catalyst for the darkness inside of me to come up and take over. And this darkness in me just keeps growing, and growing and at first, I thought that everything around me was changing, that  _you_ were changing, but in reality, it was me. And you have remained this constant person in a life. The same Archie Andrews that I met and grew up with. All warm, and red hair and sunshine. I'm just sorry. And I'm sorry that you have to deal with this insanity. I'm sorry that your dad was shot because of me."

She's crying at this point. He can't hear the sobs, but he can feel it wrack her body, and he doesn't know how to make it feel better so her takes his other hand and wraps it around the hand he was already holding, clasping it and resting it against his forehead. He looked at her and told her, in the steadiest voice he can muster, "Everything is going to be okay."

And that's all it takes for Betty to sit up and start sobbing. It's nothing hysterical, but it breaks Archie's heart. He feels this sadness and hurt and his heart drops to his stomach the moment he sees Betty, his  _best friend,_ the girl he grew up with, sitting in front of him, broken and beaten and barely holding on. It's such a stark difference between the girl he thought he knew, the warm smiles and beautiful eyes and pastel clothing. He asks himself,  _has it always been like this?_ He wants to ask, but can't find it in him to.

Instead, he hugs her, rubbing her back and letting her get his shirt wet from her tears.

"Betty, nothing you do or say will make me change the way I see you and think about you, okay? You will always be the Betty I grew up with. The Betty that saved me during elementary. The Betty that little Archie promised he would marry," they both chuckle softly at that, "and the Betty that is my best friend. Nothing is ever going to change that. You are always going to be the Betty with warm smiles and even warmer hugs. Everyone has a darkness inside of them, and it doesn't make you different, you know? You are the arguably the purest soul I have ever met. The good in you is incomparable to the darkness."

He pulls back and she wipes her eyes, sniffling softly. He grabs her hands and looks at them, a sadness in his eyes that she hasn't ever seen.

"You have nothing to be sorry for, Betty. I know it's hard, but you'll get through it.  _We_ ' _ll_ get through it, okay? You're not alone, and I don't want you to ever think that you're alone. You have me, and even though things are difficult right now, you also have Ronnie and Jughead."

He looks at her, eyes asking if she understood, so she nods in reply, and he squeezes her hand tighter.

"More than anything, I don't want you to hurt anymore. I don't want you to suffer anymore. Especially not alone, okay? Jesus, I love you, Betty. We all do."

"I love you, too." She looks up at him, eyes red, the pain still visible, and he can't help but frown and give her another hug. 

He hates it. Seeing her like this, because he's only ever seen this face on Betty once, and that was the night he broke her heart. And seeing her like this takes him back to that time, and he hates that he couldn't do anything to fix it, to make it better, so he tries his best to comfort her this time. There are tears threatening to form in his eyes, but he fights it and hugs Betty tighter instead.

By the end of the night, they are looking at the glowing stars on her ceiling, and a comfortable silence rests between them.

For the first time in a while, Betty feels like everything will be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> who else was upset about the 2x06 resolutions... or should I say, lack thereof? LOL, so here I am, with some fix-its, and my imagination is kind of running wild.
> 
> find me on tumblr! @hit0miko


	2. wish i'd let the absence tell them

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There is a venom that is company to Veronica's sweet voice, Betty thinks. It scares her much more than it should.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter two with Betty and Veronica! lots of dialogue in this one. It's kind of hard to get into Veronica's head.

The first time Betty met Veronica, it was at Pop's, during a dinner with Archie. Her first impression of her was that she was beyond beautiful, and looked every bit the New York socialite princess that people described her to be. The voice inside her told her to be careful. It told her than Veronica was a double-edged sword.

These words could not have rung truer than at the penthouse party where Betty had her 'psychotic breakdown' on Veronica. And sure, Betty has seen Veronica's bad side before, but not as vindictive and venomous as it was during the party and the days following. And sure, Betty knows that Veronica is only this cruel to her because she was the one that started it. Betty Cooper came at Veronica Lodge crueler, more sinister, with words that pierced right through her heart. Even Cheryl sat back and watched in shock as Betty's tirade skewered Veronica. 

" _You're a bad person, Veronica. You'll always be a bad person_ ," Betty remembers how these words rolled off her tongue and made her mouth dry and how much she longed to take it back and apologize and tell her what the  _fuck_ was going on with her.

Veronica kicking her out was expected, but Betty wasn't prepared for how much it would affect her later on, because she knew that Veronica didn't just kick her out of the party, she kicked her out of her life. 

Her whispers at the parent meeting made Betty's heart race and clench, and she wanted nothing more than to just scream and run out of there and tell of all them that none of this was her fault.

" _Here we go again. Saint Betty and Succubus Veronica."_

_"I may have taken jingle jangle but she's the one who had a psychotic breakdown."_

She had tried to talk to Veronica so many times, but her attempts were shut down every time.

Even Kevin had shut her down. " _Don't even try, Benedict Betty."_

_"Chill, Kevin. She's not worth it."_

And those words echo in her head, a mantra that has burned a hole into her brain over the years. It bubbles up and fuels her insecurity.

One side of Veronica is the sweet, caring friend that Betty knew. The other side is this cruel, cold-hearted villainess. Most of the time, her words don't even come off as cruel and vindictive. It doesn't have to be. Veronica knows how to make even the most neutral words sound so disgustingly vicious. If not cruel, it's impactful. And that's exactly how these words came to Betty.

She's not worth it. Not worthy of Archie's love. Not worthy of Veronica's friendship, nor her time. Not worthy enough for the Jughead that was changing everyday. She wasn't worth it.

The voice inside her heads screams at her, and at them. She wants to just yell out and scream and say that none of this is her  _fucking_ fault. She wants to cry when they tell her she's not worth it because the reason why she's doing all of this anyways is to protect them. She wants to tell them to thank her, to give a shit about her, to notice that there was something absolutely wrong with her, but the truth that she finally realizes is that none of them notice. None of them even care to notice that she's suffering, hurting, broken.

It's not until she finally screws her head on right and decides to stop letting the Black Hood torture her that she finally gets to talk to Veronica. She didn't even expect to talk to her, but after Sheriff Keller left Pop's, she heard that sweet, honey voice that could only belong to Riverdale's own Veronica Lodge.

"Drafting your next savage takedown?" Betty turns around to see her sitting alone in a booth, reading a book.

She walks towards the booth, holding her notebook tightly so that nobody could see that her hands were shaking.

"I don't expect you to believe me, but I didn't mean what I said. There's no sane excuse." Betty finds that the shakiness shifts to her voice, and it comes out soft and scared.

Veronica crosses her arms on the table and looks up at her expectantly. 

"No, there isn't. So tell me, B, what's the insane excuse?" She asks.

Betty is shocked to hear it and almost couldn't move until Veronica tapped the table and motioned for her to sit and explain.

She takes a deep breath to mentally prepare herself for telling this crazy story but Veronica might not even believe.

"The Black Hood has been calling me. He told me he was doing all of this, murdering all these people because I  _inspired_ him."

She doesn't look Veronica in the eye, but instead she looks to her clenched fists nestled between her knees.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me." Betty finally looks up, surprised to hear Veronica curse.

She sees her face and it's one of shock and disbelief and Betty can't help but let out a miserable chuckle.

"I wish I was. I really wish this is all just sick joke. A fucking prank, but it's real. It's so real. I inspired the murders. I'm the reason why Archie's dad was shot. The Black Hood kept calling me and threatening me. He was threatening everybody, telling me and promising me that he was going to cut you out of my life  _his way_ , if I didn't do it myself."

At this point, Veronica can see Betty shaking. Her avoidance of eye contact is something that, to Veronica, was very un-Betty-like, and that is what convinces her that this is not just Betty playing a sick prank on her (not that she would ever think Betty was that type of person).

"You're telling me that this is the reason why you cut me off? Is this the reason why you broke up with Jughead, too?" She asks.

Betty can't do anything but nod, letting out a sniffle and a soft "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

Veronica looks at her,  _really_ looks at her, since that night of the party and notices the small changes that she hadn't before. The dullness in her skin and the dark circles. Her eyes are bloodshot and she was still shaking. Hell, even her ponytail was on low today (and messy, too) and if anything represented Betty, it was her ponytail.

"So this whole time, while I was being a bitter bitch and talking smack about you because of what you did to me at the party, you've been having a serial killer stalk you, call you, breathe down your neck and threaten everything and everyone you hold dear?"

Betty wipes the tears that are forming in her eyes and lets out a small chuckle.

"You had every right to treat me the way you did, V."

Veronica's eyes follow Betty's movements, and she frowns, sad at her declaration.

"Jesus, Betty. You've been suffering by yourself this whole time, and you let me say all of those things about you? God, I feel like shit. Worse, meaner than Regina George and Heather Chandler combined. I wish you could have told me, or given me some kind of sign. How could I ever let my best friend ever get mentally tortured by this serial killer sicko? You literally gave up your friendships and the love of your life, your soulmate, to save everyone else?"

At this point, both of them have tears in their eyes and it's a funny, but sad sight to see.

"Archie knew, but the Black Hood found out, so I had to stop telling him what was going on."

Veronica held her hand out, motioning for Betty to bring her hand to hers. Veronica squeezes Betty's hand softly and looks at her, so much sadness and awe and admiration for the girl in front of her.

"Saint Betty, always saving everybody else. Why won't you let anyone save you?" Veronica says.

"V, it's the sanity of one person versus the lives of many others. Which one would you pick?"

"Riverdale is not Omelas, Betty. The lives and happiness of other people does not have to come at the price of one person's suffering.  _Your_ suffering. God, I wish you could have told me. I'm just so upset. I can't even imagine how terrifying that is. I'm sorry that I was such a bitch to you."

Betty shakes her head, "No, it's fine. I deserved it. I was so mean at the party. I feel like part of it was just all of the frustration that's been building up inside of me. It's not something I can control. It's just been a particularly hard couple of weeks, but I'm grateful that I finally got to talk to you and Archie about it."

"Thanks for telling me. I don't know what I could have done if we stayed like that. You're my best friend, B." There are tears again.

"I love you, V. And I told Archie that I wanted to stop being the Black Hood's puppet. I have this plan, to turn the tables around on him." Betty tells her, eyes full of fire, something that Veronica hasn't seen since the Jason Blossom case.

"What is it? Tell me and I'll do what I can to help," She replies.

"The last time he called, he told me that he would stop killing if I gave him the name of the jingle jangle supplier, the Sugarman. Clifford Blossom used to work with him and Cheryl is trying to find out who it is. Once I find the name, I'm going to dangle it over the Black Hood's head. It's going to be my game."

Veronica smiles at this, and so does Betty. "Hello, Dark Betty. Welcome again to the world of Riverdale."

"Are we back in business, V?"

Veronica's smirk grows.

"Saint Betty and Succubus Veronica, back in business!"

"

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like i didn't really know how to portray the Beronica friendship b/c Veronica is such a complex character lol. But i hope you guys enjoyed this second installment! Now, it's just time for the last, but not least, chapter; the awaited bughead reunion!!
> 
> find me at my tumblr, @hit0miko!


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